Many of us benefit from the mothering of a woman other than or in addition to our own mother. This is the female figure in your life who consults, consoles, and nourishes your spirit and strengthens your emotional well-being. This wonderful woman may be a sister-friend, a co-worker, a church or community leader, or someone you quietly admire and seek guidance every now and then.
This mother's day I want you to express your love and gratitude to the many women who mother and comfort you in your life. Give the special gift or tribute you have planned for your own mother and also offer a token on appreciation for the magic in mothering you experience from the other "mothers" who influence your life. This mother may be the one who:
Happy Valentine's Day Weekend! As you continue your celebration of life and love I hope you spend this week attracting, creating, and maintaining the excitement of real authentic love. The art and practice of love begins with the love that you give to you. To experience the intimate and profound love you desire from others you have to be ready and willing to create it within yourself. The experience of love resonates in your brain and your body. As you romance with your mind give your body some attention too.
In this week's Sun-day design learn to adore you body and find 50 places to touch and express your warmth and gratitude. Play with a partner or engage the healing power of massage on your own. Open up the gateway to love by awakening the energy and possibility ready in each of your cells. Like a mother caressing her newborn baby this purpose of this practice is to stimulate growth and a deeper bond. You spend so much time wanting to shape and control the bond you have with others you forget the source of the bond is any relationship is the one your first create with yourself.
So here's the plan, start with each of your toe and work your way up. Give special attention to your heel, ankles, and arches. Your legs, knees and thighs get some quality time too. Each finger, each elbow, each ear, scalp and face is stroked. Tummy time, try using your fingertips to write "I love you" across your ribs. Whichever area you choose to start is up to you. For further guidance click here to learn more about Abhyanga, the Ayurveda practice for giving yourself a warm oil massage, from Deepak Chopra's Center. The Ayurveda approach begins from the scalp to the toes, I say design your massage to your heart's desire. Share your approach to self care and the gratitude you show your body this week!
Before I ask you to thank one more person this Thanksgiving Weekend, I would first like to thank you. Allow me to express my sincere appreciation and gratitude for your reading this blog, whether it's your first time or your weekly installment, I know Design You Coaching would not be the same without you. Equally important I must also thank the detractors, naysayers and negative Nilly's in my life. Without them, I wouldn't push myself with such fervor and determination. In this week's Sun-day design I want you to join me and thank your foes and frenemies for the fire and drive they ignite in your life.
Think of 3 people you have difficulty with. These may be people you speak to and even consider friend but when you're around them something inside you is roused and agitated, you get a bit unwound. That list should be pretty easy to come up with. Pick one of the three names and write it on a piece of paper.
Next to that name write the biggest issue you have with that person, and describe what you're holding against him or her. This may be some moment of misunderstanding, hurt, disappointment, disrespect, or some indiscretion you hold from an a previous experience you've had with this person. Once you've written how the whole drama played out because of that person, I want you to now describe (and write down) your part in it. Include all the ways you created this very situation you loathe.
Now, think of all the ways you've grown from the situation, learning more about who you are, the person you desire to be and the gap in between. Use your notes from this exercise to write this person a letter thanking them for being a teacher in your life. You don't have to mail the letter, that part's really up to you. The goal is that you send your appreciate for this person (or at least the situation) out in the world so that energy, courage, and grace comes back to you. Trust that the love and gratefulness you give will fill your life too. Leave a comment and share your story about your own reflective gift of gratitude.
Actor Robin Williams passing this week reminded me that it’s so important you show your gratitude to the people who inspire and support you through the good and bad times. One of my favorites characters Robin Williams played was the Genie in the movie Aladdin. The most revealing dialogue in that movie is when the Genie talks about what it means to be free, to be your own master. The Genie’s admission of his life-long dream pretty much captures the journey of your life too.
To be the master of your own fate does not mean you are selfish or narcissistic. It’s about being true to yourself and honoring the life you desire, not the version society, your parents, or even the impractical pressures you put on yourself. There are few people in your life who see glimpses and already loves the real you. In this week’s Sun-day design say thank you to the Genie in your life.
Some people in your life are clearly champions and have your back. Others are less obvious advocates; they’re like a Genie in a bottle and show up just when you really need them. Your Genie may be someone you don’t see often or haven’t known for long and nonetheless when you see this person there is an immediate and deep connection. This person inspires you, gives great energy, supports your dreams, and you in turn find yourself captivated by theirs too. This person grants your wish, your desire for friendship, for acceptance, for truth, or love. Now think about the person who is your Genie.
Think about the people who support you in ways others do not. Your Genie may show up as the person who simply listens to you without judgment and understands the reasons you secretly want to move to another country, begin your career as a writer, or return to school for another degree even as you struggle to balance work and family commitments. While you may not think about or speak to this person often, receiving an email or phone from him/her warms your heart. Your spiritual connection with this person recharges and refocuses you any time you connect.
It is time. Reach out to the Genie in your life, say thank you. Tell this person the profound impact he or she has in your life. Show your appreciation for the person who supports you in being a master of your fate. As Aladdin’s Genie so eloquently said, “To be my own master. Such a thing would be greater than all the magic and all the treasures in the world.” You are a master, co-creator of your life. Share your own story about the Genie who supports your ambitions and pursuit of freedom.
The life we experience is designed to help us grow. My wish is that you learn from me as much as I learn from you. Share your life lessons and let's build together.