It's funny watch people respond to my transition from relaxed to natural hair. I get all kinds of reactions from 'wow look at YOU' to 'hi there, I don't know what to say about your hair so I'll just look away and pretend I don't see it 😳' . My favorite reaction of all was from someone who told me I'm very frisky with my new hair. Frisky hmm, I don't hear that word much but I kind of like it! If it means I'm coming into my own, gracefully and without hesitance or apology then I'm all for it. How often do we spend our lives putting a shade on our light to not blind the sensitive eyes around us. I like what feeling frisky is doing in my life and I want you to experience this surge in your life too, so of course this week's Sun-day design is for you to be frisky. I want you to feel so comfortable and enamored with your own self people can't help but notice the real you.
The word frisky has such a juicy tang to it I had to find out what it actually means. Urbandictionary.com defines frisky as "possessing a sexual feeling". Google.com defines frisky as "lively, bouncy, bubbly, perky, active, energetic, animated, spirited, exuberant..." I really can go on, but when I read just these words alone I say, YES! I want to live like this!
What woman doesn't want to feel sexual, vibrant, high-spirited, bubbly, and let's not forget about perky too! What man or woman isn't attracted to a lady who is self-assured, excited about life, and gives off positive energy?
For some women all it takes to feel frisky is putting on her favorite dress (and having it fit!), wearing hot red lipstick, or lathering herself in a favorite pursue or body oil. I want your frisky feeling to last so you may also think about getting a massage, going out dancing, or playing hooky from work to spend the day with you. The key is to choose something that enhances or cultivates an part of you that's often ignored. If it's your mind, journal or read a book you've wanted to get to for some time. If it's your body, treat it with care. If it's your heart, share it with others.
Turns out it's my natural hair's got me feeling frisky, what going to turn up the volume for you? Leave a comment and below and share your ideas for getting your frisky on this week.
I have a candy-crushing confession. There was a time that I spent 3 hours a week playing that addictive app. Late adopter that I was this new fascination started to take over my life just as I was starting to grow my business. As I worked on Design You Coaching ideas and possible ventures I'd get so excited my head would start spinning - and to calm down that electric sensation I would play that mind-numbing game. The problem is not the game itself, the issue is that the feeling of creativity and excitement became a cue for game time. If you've read the book The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg, then you know I was in a dangerous zone!!
That candy was crushing my dreams!! My brain had created an unhealthy pattern that work time meant game time. Ever notice right when you're fiercely working on a goal rocking it out then "suddenly" you're distracted or tired and decide you deserve a break?
If so, that means candy is crushing you dreams too! Your candy crusher may not be a smart phone app, it can be the time you spend checking FB, Tweeting, or watching the latest Scandal marathon! Twenty minutes here, two hours there, and before you know it you could have easily spent a whole day a week working on your career, relationships or your body!
The next time your brain is on fire with that intense feeling and burst of energy - say when you're writing or working on a new business idea, trust that your body will go into flight or fight mode, and that's okay. Remember your body may not be comfortable with the actual physical sensation or even discomfort you feel when stepping outside your comfort zone. Moving your life in a different direction is not always a comfortable and easy process. Embrace the uneasy feeling and trust that if creativity felt like the mundane we'd never push the envelope or challenge the status quo.
Here are three easy ways you can make sure game time doesn't infringe on life time:
If you have other ideas for staying on track, be sure to leave a comment below.
"Always needing to stay immediate by removing what is no longer real is the working definition of "sacrifice" - giving up with reverence and compassion what no longer words in order to stay close to what is sacred"
- Mark Nepo
Moms sacrifice giving up so much and do so all the time that we don't even notice. Like breathing air, you only think about it when you're suffocating because it's not there at all. I love this quote from Mark Nepo because he reminds us sacrifice is not just about loosing something, it's about recognizing what doesn't work so you can let it go in honor of making room for what's most important. Moms let go of so much to energize their kid's own dreams. In honor of mothers and those who mother by virtue of the work they do, the Sun-day Design for this week is sacrifice. In addition to the flowers, I want you to give the gift of SACRIFICE to you and your mom.
The best gift you can give your mom is to recognize the ways she's shown up in support for your life. It could be her putting off her education, turning down a promotion that would keep her away from the home, not buying a new car, whatever it is. Thank her by telling her EXACTLY what you know she's sacrificed for you. She will appreciate that message as much as any gift you put in a box. If your mom is not an email or phone call away, write a letter and store that note in box with your other memoirs of mom.
It's time you now sacrifice something for mom. Maybe you spend a day with her doing her favorite thing - gardening, grocery shopping, a day at the spa. Whatever would make her feel great. Again, if mom's not her physically or spiritually, sacrifice and give some of your time or money to her favorite charity or organization in her honor.
Now do the same for you. Write a list of all the things you sacrifice and don't get to in pursuit of your dreams or other important commitments. For example, I don't travel as much as I'd like because I choose to sacrifice and use that money toward my dream as a parent which is to send my son on educational and experiential adventures around the world. My dream in giving him more travel experience as a teen is more precious to me than my own travel expeditions right now.
We all have to sacrifice something as we work toward our dreams. Take some time this week to honor the sacrifices your mom has made in being a parent to you and also the things you give up to pursue your role as a parent and other dreams. Let us know what you're willing to let go as you work toward being the beautiful and wonderful you.
Okay, so it wasn't exactly MY date with Deepak, a few 100 other TEDx Talk Times Square guests were there too. I call it a date because Deepak was the ONE I was there to see. I've read a few of his books and have meditated with him and Oprah as part of their 21-Day Meditation Challenge. While I am forever grateful for hearing him speak live and feeling his presence, it was actually the other speakers who won over my heart and mind. That's not to say one speaker was better than another, this was really about how the speakers I wasn't as familiar with gave the talks that exposed me most to new ideas and reminded me why I was really there - to be inspired. This got me thinking how often we miss out on what other people bring in our lives because we're so busy looking up at the one we've put on a pedestal. This singular focus makes us turn a blind eye to the gifts other people bring in our relationships too!
We yearn so much for THE ONE to wow us, to give us exactly what we think we need in a way that feels good to us. The one person I'm referring to can be a spouse, a parent, a friend, boyfriend/girlfriend, or the love of your life you're still hoping to meet. Anytime we have expectations of others that are so big, we often ignore the fact that the what we're looking for maybe right within arms reach from someone else. At the conference I was looking for Deepak to share new wisdom and although he reinforced the reasons why I need, love, and miss my meditation practice - and why I need to get back on track, it was the other guest speakers who blew my mind. They introduced new and exciting information and I immediately found myself thinking of ways I can learn more and incorporate their nuggets into my own practice.
Attending that conference with the initial intention to hear Deepak and yet finding the most profound enlightenment through the other speakers reminded me that beauty, innovation, inspiration, expertise, and love, comes from many different people and in different ways. One person or one relationships may not give you everything you desire and that's OK. Take the pressure off, allow that person to come off that pedestal and walk with you in this life side by side. Recognize that some relationships are great for light-hearted gossiping, some people you can turn to for the hard honest truth, some you can coddle up to for comfort, and others will inspire you to do more, be more, and give more to others.
The Sun-day Design for this week is to greatness in all. Whos' the Deepak or larger than life person you expect too much from? Who are the "other speakers" who are just as influential in your life but whom you haven't shown enough gratitude. They share their greatness with you in their time, talent, and support. Now it's time you go thank them!
Leave a comment below telling us who you've thanked.
The life we experience is designed to help us grow. My wish is that you learn from me as much as I learn from you. Share your life lessons and let's build together.