What's your default disposition when there's trouble in paradise? In the heat of the moment is your reaction to negotiate and fight for your best interest, settle for what's given or heatedly walk away? Most people unconsciously fall into one of these categories, and each style has real purpose and value for navigating different roadblocks in life. In this week's Sun-day design I want you to recognize how often do you negotiate, settle or walk away from difficult people or difficult conversations. To identify your dominant defensive style think about every point of contention you experienced in the last week - the ones you verbalized and the incidents where you quietly simmered and you kept to yourself. Write your list and identify the style you used to deal with each situation. Tally your results, then go deeper and think about how that particular style shows up in you. Let's take a look at a few examples that resonate with each style:
I'm admittedly a work-in-progress Negotiator learning to adopt the Settlers approach in welcoming other people's point of view and accepting their thoughts and feelings as their own approach to self-advocacy. So what's your style? Leave a post and share your default style and lessons you've learned.
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How often do you think to yourself that if you had the opportunity to choose and decide the course of action for your life you would be so much better off? A day doesn't go by that you don't think that once you're in a position to choose your new career, home, where you vacation or even the people in your life you would be so happy. You have the opportunity to choose everything in your life - or certainly your reaction to what you experience and are presented with everyday, whatever position you currently find yourself in. In this week's Sun-day design I want you to calculate the real price of freedom and determine the time and resources you need in order to direct key areas of life the way you desire. When you embrace your freedom to choose the career you love, the partner that pushes you beyond your comfort zone, or the financial standing that keep you thriving for more, you inevitably accept the responsibility that comes with it. The moment you choose the life an entrepreneur you are deciding to invest your money, time, talent, energy, expertise in something I hope you love, or certainly will profit from financially. The investment in channeling your personal resources into your business means less time for friends, money for extraneous things, fewer social excursions, and less social media views. The price you pay for your business is real and personally taxing. You have to believe it's worth it to continue. It's your turn. What's the price you pay to develop the business of your dreams, to raise a family, to live in the house you call your home, to date, to love, to be the best you that you know how to be? Consider the hours, money, brain-power, heartache, and love you pour in. Appreciate the ingredients to success. Share your story and all the ways you've invested in your dreams. Perfectionism gets a bad rap! As an evolving perfectionist I know firsthand the benefits in the pursuit of perfection as well as the real risk of not appreciating the scenery because you're so fixated on one ideal spot. There is a distinct difference between obsessing about details and an authentic commitment to quality. You invest so much time in "work" whether for your own business or your employer's, of course you want to feel proud of what you produce. Well getting to that place of pride takes effort. It would be like saying you don't mind hitting the gym 3 hours, five days a week only to have to the same weight or physique. That would be ludicrous and pretending you don't want to be perfect at anything is just as silly. In this week's Sun-day design I want you to find the plus side of perfection by redefining what perfection means for you. Think of something in your life that you love and strive to be an expert in. This is very often your career, favorite hobby, or unique talent or gift you have. It my also be a significant role you play as a partner, partner or colleague. area of life you want to not only want improve. Based on where you are now what would make this week perfect in that area for you? For example, what would perfection look like for you as you build your career? One of my favorite inspirations is Shaun T, even as a top fitness expert he is always define what perfection means to him, and as a result pushing his business and his body further. Let's look at an area I'm working on - being a great mother. What makes a perfect mother? Well when I ask my son he wants a mother is supportive, compassionate, loving and kind. The great thing is these same qualities will help me become an even better coach. The pursuit of perfection has its benefits. When you work to perfect your thinking, your words or your craft you inevitably invest in designing you. Even if the bar is obscurely set beyond reach the journey nonetheless can make you a better pilot navigating through your beautiful life. So for which are of life are you redefining perfection - money, relationships, career? Leave a post and share your path to perfection. One of my favorite songs is Sade's Babyfather, especially the line "For you he's the best he can be." So often we forget this is true for each of us. We are human and every so often come up short in the eyes of others, but the love, compassion, and strength the men in our lives share deserves thanks and praise. Your own "babyfather" may be the father of your children as the song implies, or in this space he may be your husband, partner, friend, mentor or any man in your life who sees your light. In this week's Sun-day design celebrate your babyfather by reminding him of all the ways he is heard, valued and loved. This father's day show at least one special man in your life the many ways you hear and understand his dreams, goals, and desires. Listen and share in the excitement he holds for this year and the future. Don't offer your ideas or plan out his next steps, simply be a present. Your celebration should also demonstrate how much your father figure is valued. Give him something that shows your appreciation for the contributions he makes in your life. The best way to show him what you value is to give him the very thing you gives you. If you value his hugs - tell him and give him the best hug that you know how. If you value his mind and artistry, write him a song or poem. See him just you want him to seen - in truth. The most important part of celebrating your babyfather is shower him with love in a way that he feels loved and cherished. In other words it's important for you to show love for him in his love language. This can be a challenge because you often want to give love in a way that you like to receive it. The book the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman was given to me by a great friend and is a treasure in helping you learn how to love in a way it can be fully received. The act of taking time to show your babyfather that you appreciate the best he can be is a wonderful gift beyond measure. Father's Day is a wonderful time to honor all the men in and around your life who give their best. Leave a comment and share how you will celebrate your babyfather on this special day. Imagine a career that's bigger, better and richer than the one you're in right now. A career where you are appreciated, well compensated, learn, grow and have fun with the people you work with. The type of career people read about in Forbes magazine and often wonder why not you. Truth is it can be you, the key is to define success beyond any single job or career path. In this week's Sun-day design I want you to create your career bucket list. Build your career dream that infuses the full range of your talents, strengths, interests and capabilities. First, write your very own career wish list. Capture everything you want to do, see and experience over your lifetime. Here are few ideas to jump start your thinking - write a book about your life story, build your own company, teach women's wellness classes, accept a job overseas where you have to learn a new language, be sure to also include the philanthropic work you want to do, your global impact and reach. List at least 10 different careers. My own top 5 are entrepreneur, dancer, executive, author, and life coach - of course! Other ideas to consider - pilot, athlete, orator, painter, doctor, lawyer, talent agent, singer, chef, masseuse...I can go on. Share your list with some friends. They can offer great insights as to career and/or contributions you can give to people in the world. Now for each experience you have listed, pick the one that you just have to do. The one you want the world to still talk about when you're no longer here. Okay, got it. Next, think of one thing you can do toward that goal this year. If it's writing your book commit to an outline or the first three chapters. Last step is to do it this week! Yikes, say what?? Yes, you can write those chapters this week, it's been stirrings in your head and heart for years. Want to go global, well there are global centers, programs and outreach in every major U.S. City. If that's not feasible the global community is online too. One small step on the career journey you love is achievable in the span of one week. You are ready, start that kick starter or go fund me project. Leave a comment and share your career bucket list story too. |
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Lessons LearnedThe life we experience is designed to help us grow. My wish is that you learn from me as much as I learn from you. Share your life lessons and let's build together. Archives
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